Shaken To My Core

The best way to express what saw and felt is to simply write it. Twenty-four hours ago I stood in midst of 25 beautiful orphaned infants and toddlers. It was feeding time, so many were crying, some just staring and others playfully entertaining themselves. 

Then I noticed the most beautiful eyes staring at me from the corner crib. Her skin was like a chocolate Hersey kiss and eyes like bright buttons. She was not there the evening prior. I immediately went and picked her up and gave her my “chewable” kisses. She barely smiled. There was a deep sadness and I felt it in the pit of my stomach. 

I inquired of her to one of the caretakers and was informed that she and her two older siblings had just arrived a few hours before. She was about one years old, and her siblings were estimated to be about 3 years and 6 years old. No one was sure because of their present trauma, they were not communicating yet.

The three little ones had been found abandoned in a house. It was estimated they had been alone two or more weeks. My tears started flowing and my heart beating fast, then slow, then fast, etc. My emotions were crazy and my mind could not process it’s own thoughts. I held her tighter and all I could do was pray in my heart.

I sat her back in her crib and gave her a little ball that was near by; she gripped it and continued to stare at me. 

I went into the infant area to check on a newborn  who only weighed  1.7lbs and he was sleeping well. When I returned to the one year old Hersey kiss baby girl, to my shock……there were two older children in the crib with her. They were hugging and rubbing her beautiful kinky hair. She was smiling. They all held each other. My heart broke and my inner core twisted in emotional pain.

The caretaker walked into the room and informed me that the two children were her siblings and they must have escaped from the area two floors down and located their baby sister. When she went to ask them to walk with her back downstairs, the baby screamed and the two older ones tried to hold on with all they had. 

OMG! I could not stand up any longer. I had to grab my little baby, while the caretaker helped the two older ones. We told them they would visit with each other after breakfast and bath time. 

But I knew in a couple days that the two older ones would go to the other Orphnage where the school age kids lived. It’s a beautiful  facility with so much love and things to do. BUT in the hearts of these three little ones, they rather be in their old house with no food, no parents, no electricity, etc., but they would have each other. It’s all they know…..the love of each other. 

They had a Mom once. They were not malnourished and the 6 year old had skills beyond her years.  As I look into their eyes I see that they’ve seen things I probably could not understand or handle as a privileged American. Their love and protective spirits for one another is tangible.  

All I know right now is James 1:27 is God’s heart and as a disciple of Jesus Christ, it must be my heart. 

Lord help me to be your hands and feet. May Your love flow freely as I do Your perfect will in the earth. 



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